What is Veteran's Day?
Well, for years and years it was just another Monday off school. You know, the one you get just two weeks before Thanksgiving and you're so excited to have just that one extra day to do whatever you want. The one where you get together with family and friends because everyone is off and you have this big barbecue and play games and enjoy the day.
Today? Not so much.
Today I look at Veteran's Day very differently from the way I did ten years ago. Even differently from the way I viewed it five years ago.
Why?
For starters I've been a military wife. That didn't work out so well for me, but the association with the military gave me a new view on the men and women who serve our country. There was a period of several years where it was my goal to join them and serve beside them. I was able to see these ordinary people become extraordinary by signing a few papers, attending weeks of training and becoming a person willing to lay down their life for their family, friends and country.
It was like a wake-up call to know these men and women. To watch them wake up before dawn every morning to go to work. To see them come home dead tired at the end of each day, knowing they would get up and do it again tomorrow. To gaze at the empty space they had just filled because they had to walk away to go overseas for several months. To sit, waiting for the bus to pull up announcing their arrival back in our country.
Talk about people to respect and look up to.
I will admit that my ex husband and I didn't make it through a deployment. It's not necessarily a fact that I'm proud of, but there are sound reasons behind our decision to split up.
My ex husband served two tours overseas. He spent a total of 14 months in Iraq between February 2008 and February 2010. I am proud of him everyday for signing his enlistment papers and following through on what he had promised himself to do for his country. I am proud that Kaley's father had the courage to do what so many men and women can't bring themselves to even consider.
I am proud of all the men and women who have joined our armed forces. They deserve the highest respect that can be paid. These men and women go off to war, not knowing if they will return home. They don't know if they will see their families and friends again. They don't know if they will ever again know the comfort of their own bed or have their children run up to them at the end of a long day. Yet they do it. Because they believe it's the right thing to do.
Now I'm not a military wife anymore. I'm not a wife at all. I'm a wife-to-be, though.
And I'm going to be married to a Veteran.
Sure I wasn't around for his life in the military. But I'm here for the aftermath.
I wasn't there for his first seven spine surgeries, or his two knee surgeries. But I'm going to be there for the rest of them.
Pat was a soldier in the U.S. Army. He spent 15 months overseas. Within the first two months of his tour he was involved in three separate IED explosions. The last explosion left him lying face down in the dirt while his fellow soldiers were under fire. It's a miracle he was still alive by the time they were able to retrieve him.
That explosion put him into a coma for two months. When he woke up he was notified that he had already undergone one spine surgery and needed to have another. They were ready to put him on a plane and send him home.
But because it wasn't an absolute emergency and completely necessary at that time, Pat decided to finish his tour with his men. He didn't want to leave them behind. He had signed papers, he had been given orders and he wasn't willing to walk away from what he'd sworn he would do. He wasn't ready to stop defending our country. Pat was in it for the long haul.
That's a soldier to be proud of. That's the man I see everyday. I see a man who would have given everything, including his own life, health and safety, for the men and women he deployed with. I see a man would couldn't walk away until he knew his friends were safe. I see a man who knew his purpose and wasn't going to listen to anyone tell him what he should and shouldn't do.
How do I see this?
In the stories he tells. In his face when he tells them. In the way he fights through the pain he endures everyday. In the way he turns up the volume on the radio when American Soldier starts playing. In the way he tells me that he would go back to the Army if he could. In the way he stood up last night to honor the flag of our country at Kaley's Veteran's Day concert. In the way he can hardly get out of bed for the pain he is feeling. In the strength he finds within himself to face each day ahead of him.
I am completely amazed by him. And by all of our Veteran's who have found the strength to move forward with their lives. I don't know what it must be like for them on the inside, but watching some of them struggle outwardly because they are determined to succeed is incredible. It's not an easy task to move forward from a war.
The nightmares brought on by PTSD. The surgeries brought on by missions that went awry. The knowledge that they could have lost their lives. The understanding that they would have been willing to give up their life to save another.
I listened to a number of Veteran's speak last night. I watched one or two of them get emotional. I helped my fiancé to stand when they called for men and women who have served in the current war to stand and be honored. I felt the tears in my eyes. Because I am proud of him. And I am proud of all of our Veteran's. They've done wonderful things in their lives and the deserve the respect and love of our country.
So before you go away for your three-day, holiday weekend with a barbecue on Monday, I ask that you think about these men and women. I ask that you remember why it is we celebrate them this weekend. I ask that you think about the flag of our country and why it flies. I ask that you pay attention to the ceremonies held across the nation to honor these men and women. I ask that you thank the Lord for the people who fight and have fought for your freedom.
Be proud to live in the Land of the Free. And remember that you are here because of the Brave.
