Tired. All. The. Time.

Life is still ridiculously crazy. I honestly feel like I haven't stopped for weeks or months or years. It's starting to catch up to me in a big way.

I'm exhausted by the end of the day. But it's not exhaustion that causes me to sleep. I'm exhausted some nights to the point that I can't get to sleep at a reasonable hour. Like the other night when I couldn't get to sleep until after the Patriot's game ended, which was after midnight. Seriously!? I'm not even a Patriots fan! But I could not for the life of me fall asleep.

But then there are nights where I lay down at 8 and I'm asleep within ten minutes. It's ridiculous! I can't afford to be asleep that early in the evening! I have chapters to read for school and papers to grade for work and I am currently winging it this week, making up lesson plans as I go because I haven't sat down to write them down. I know what I want to do, I just haven't found two minutes to sit down and put it in my planner to turn in to the principal. Crazy!

This week they are doing IOWA testing at school which means that my class schedule is all out of whack this week. Honestly, this is actually a blessing for me because I don't have classes until the afternoons. I still have to be at work at 9:30, though, so I've got a lot of down time. Except it's not down time. No, no, no, no, no..... This is my catch up time! I literally spent over 3 hours catching up on grading papers and figuring out which students have missing assignments and tracking down why student X is failing and adding in Extra Credit points that 7th and 8th grade earned. It was exhausting in it's own way!

Pat and I are trying to figure out where we stand financially. Tallying up money and then looking at the bills we both have to pay? Not my idea of a fun evening. And it gets really frustrating after a while because you just want the numbers to all magically work. Seriously, I know they work. I just haven't figured out how to make them work because our pay schedules are totally different and we are both trying to save for the wedding and it's just insanity. And, again, exhausting in it's own way.

Oh, and we can't forget my schoolwork. It seems to be never-ending, but in reality, the end is actually in sight! I only have 4 classes left until graduation! The catch? Two of those classes are major, MAJOR exams. One of them is only offered during three windows each year. So that basically means that if I don't pass it when I take it mid-November, I can't take it again until March. Of course that adds to the stress level. And adding to my stress level just makes me what? Yup, you guessed it- tired. All. The. Time.

I will say that Pat and I have started going to the gym. We went three days last week which was seriously awesome. And we worked it out over the weekend so we can start going five days a week, Monday through Friday. And the weird part of it is that I'm NOT as tired after a long hard workout. How backwards is that!? I've just poured sweat and worked out for an hour and now I'm NOT tired?? I know that's how it's supposed to work and that it's a good thing but it's kind of annoying. I want to have that kind of energy at night when I'm looking at the 12 chapters of reading I need to do. Or when I'm staring at the 65 assignments I have to grade. Or when I'm looking at all of the wedding papers spread out across my desk trying to figure out what to check off of the to-do list next. Or when I'm sitting at my computer thinking that I really want to write a blog.

But when it comes down to it?

I'm just too tired.

 

I've spent a lot of time lately contemplating how tired I am and evaluating how much further I can run myself into the ground. I honestly don't remember being this tired ever before in my life. Not when I was a teenager. Not when I was pregnant. Not when I was waking up every three hours with Kaley for the first 8 months of her life. Not when I became a single parent.

 

And I'm sitting here trying to figure out where I can step back from the things I have going on. The reality, though, is that I can't step back from anything. I'm committed to teaching and I'm loving every exhausting second of it. I'm committed to finishing my degree and I am so close to having it in hand that I can't stop now. And there's no way I'm putting wedding planning on hold because I just can't wait to marry the man of my dreams.

 

So I guess I've come to realize that I'm just going to be tired.

 

And hopefully I can keep myself together enough to not get cranky with everyone around me.

 

But maybe I should hope that they love me enough to put up with me when I do get cranky...?

TGIF Blog Hop!

Welcome back to the TGIF Blog HOP!!!
We have taken a few weeks off of the Blog Hop for a couple reasons but decided last week to start back again.
People just weren't participating anymore. Not just in this hop, but hops everywhere. People weren't following the rules. 
The hops are a lot of work to put together and it's frustrating to see little turnout and people not following the few rules.
SO, I'd like to try something BRAND NEW. You know me, I'm always trying something new.
I am going to post 2 Linkys below. The first Linky is where you can post your Blog, Facebook, Twitter, Etc. I ask that you at least follow the Hosts, Platinum Sponsors, and a few others on the list below. Leave them a comment and let them know you found them here and ask them to kindly return the favor. This is how the hop "SHOULD" work.
The second linky is a GIVEAWAY linky. Post all of your GIVEAWAYS that you currently have running. Use the picture that best represents the giveaway. Maybe visit a few other giveaways and enter them if you'd like. Leave them a comment and let them know you found them here and tell them what your giveaways are. Maybe they'll return the favor. You could also share the link to this hop on your social media sites. Even non bloggers could visit just to enter all the fabulous giveaways. Shoot, FB and Twitter folks could join the hop too even if they don't have a blog.
Let's work together to make this an enjoyable event for everyone.
Thanks in advance!
The Hosts and Platinum Sponsor(s) are below. They make this Hop HAPPEN!

  

  



 

  

Advertise your Blog HERE! 

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TGIF Blog Hop is BACK!

Welcome back to the TGIF Blog HOP!!!
We have taken a few weeks off of the Blog Hop for a couple reasons.
People just weren't participating anymore. Not just in this hop, but hops everywhere. People weren't following the rules. 
The hops are a lot of work to put together and it's frustrating to see little turnout and people not following the few rules.
SO, I'd like to try something BRAND NEW. You know me, I'm always trying something new.
I am going to post 2 Linkys below. The first Linky is where you can post your Blog, Facebook, Twitter, Etc. I ask that you at least follow the Hosts, Platinum Sponsors, and a few others on the list below. Leave them a comment and let them know you found them here and ask them to kindly return the favor. This is how the hop "SHOULD" work.
The second linky is a GIVEAWAY linky. Post all of your GIVEAWAYS that you currently have running. Use the picture that best represents the giveaway. Maybe visit a few other giveaways and enter them if you'd like. Leave them a comment and let them know you found them here and tell them what your giveaways are. Maybe they'll return the favor. You could also share the link to this hop on your social media sites. Even non bloggers could visit just to enter all the fabulous giveaways. Shoot, FB and Twitter folks could join the hop too even if they don't have a blog.
Let's work together to make this an enjoyable event for everyone.
Thanks in advance!
The Hosts and Platinum Sponsor(s) are below. They make this Hop HAPPEN!

  

  



 

  

Advertise your Blog HERE! 

Grab our Button!

Copy the code below:

<a href="http://funnypostpartumlady.org"> <img src="http://akaywebdesign.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/button_edited-1.png" /></a>

EVERYTHING LINKY GIVEAWAY LINKY

Wedding Updates [1]

So I have been trying to wait until we had our engagement photos back to write a post about the happenings for the wedding. But our photographer was unfortunately having some computer troubles and had to send it off to be fixed. So we are still waiting to get those back, but hopefully it will be within the next couple of weeks and I can share those with you.

In the meantime, though, we've made quite a bit of headway towards the wedding!

The first thing we did, honestly without intending to, was find my dress. The weekend after Pat and I got engaged, we were heading to Greenville. Being the crazy person that I am, I had already created an account on David's Bridal and they had called to set up an appointment. Figuring it would be a good opportunity to look around and see what I liked, I set one up for that Sunday when we would be in town.

Little did I know that I would walk in and choose 10 dresses to try on. And I absolutely didn't think that I would try on only 4 before I found the dress. Honestly, it couldn't have been any more perfect. It fit like it was made for me, no alterations necessary. I added a few accessories to it to really complete the look and chose a sleeve style and a veil and we were good to go. I was able to walk out of the store with my dress THAT DAY!

What else happened that day? Well, we were able to find Kaley's dress! Kaley is going to be our flower girl and she is so incredibly excited. It really is adorable to listen to her talk about the wedding and all of the plans she has for throwing flower petals as she walks down the aisle. Oh, and you should seriously hear her reception plans. Pizza. Milk. Cookies.

But anyways. So we found the perfect dress for Kaley, also. Unfortunately she's crazy tiny so fitting a dress was a struggle. We actually ended up going with one in a size 6. Why? Because I wanted the length of it. There's about 4 inches in the body that have to be taken in, though, because she's never going to fill out that much in the next 9 months. It's just not a happening thing in her life. But she still looked adorable when she tried it on! And the colors of it match my dress!

I also selected a dress for my bridesmaids that day, as well as the color (Champagne) they would be in. It was probably the easiest experience I've had, too, because I texted them and said this is the dress and color and I didn't receive any complaints! Amazing! Honestly, that really tells me that I made the right decisions about who should stand up with me that day. It couldn't be any better and I am so excited!

What else have we accomplished? Well, we've started a wedding folder for all of the paperwork and everything we will collect over the next several months. Does that count as an accomplishment? It even has things in it already!

We also had our meeting with Fr. Bill and set an official date for the wedding! Pat and I will be married on May 31, 2014! The church is reserved, Fr. Bill has it on his calendar and all that's left is to coordinate with the Deacon who we hope will actually perform the ceremony. We're trying to make life difficult. Pat and I want the Deacon to marry us, but we want a full Mass. And only a priest can perform a full Mass. So we're working out our own special ceremony with everyone fit in!

Fr. Bill gave us the beginning paperwork to fill out and the book to begin choosing the music selections and readings we would like to have incorporated into our ceremony. When he gave it to us, I was thinking it was way too early. But now that I'm looking at the entire picture and everything we have going on this year.... Yeah, we're going to start looking at that book this weekend!

We've started making a list of reception sites and I plan to start making calls for rates and such at the beginning of next week. I know that we need to book it as soon as possible, and if life was perfect it would have already been done, but we had to wait until we had the date worked out with the church before we could reserve a reception hall. So I'm working on it. It's just not done yet.

Yesterday we went back to Greenville for my birthday. I decided that what I wanted most for my birthday was to get some things done for the wedding. We still hadn't decided on a secondary color to go with the Champagne I had originally chosen. So off we went to spend twenty minutes staring at the rack of fabric in DB debating over which one we liked best. In the end we went with the color called Wine. Personally I find it amusing that our colors are Champagne and Wine and we're planning to have very little alcohol at the reception, only one glass of wine per person for the toast. There's going to be children all over the place and no one needs to be drinking heavily in front of them!

So anyways, we selected a color. Once I'd selected the color we were able to look for a decorative bow for Kaley's flower girl basket! My great grandfather made beautiful hand-woven baskets for each of his grandchildren and great-grandchildren to have their flower girl carry when they were married. I love the basket, so I don't want to cover it entirely, but I do want a little bit of color added to it.

We also found a dress for Gramma to wear and got ideas for my mom and Pat's mom! And can I just say that Pat was truly awesome yesterday? We spent an hour and a half in DB and he didn't complain once the entire time. I am truly blessed!

He also never complained when we walked down the storefronts to Men's Wearhouse to select outfits for the men! We settled on tan pants, with a tan vest, an ivory button down shirt and a champagne tie for Pat. I went with the tan suit because it really fit my vision and it was, literally, a perfect match to the Champagne swatch I held up to it for comparison! The groomsmen and my dad will be wearing the same thing, but with a wine colored tie. And the sleeves of their shirts will be rolled.

My inspiration from Pinterest :)

We also made our way over to Barnes and Noble where I made a bee-line for the wedding section to select a Wedding Planning Workbook! I am happy to say that I only looked at ten or so before I finally settled on one. It's a binder, with dividers, and everything is clearly labeled. Exactly what I wanted and not ridiculously expensive.

I also happened across a book that I can't wait to read! It's called "The Bride's Survival Guide: 150 Mistakes You Should Avoid for the Perfect Wedding". I'm seriously excited to start flipping my way through this book to read all of the things I really shouldn't do that it's entirely possible I already have in mind. It's sure to be educational!

At this point, that's all we have done. Honestly, yesterday morning I would have told you we had gotten no where and had so much to do that it wasn't even funny. I wasn't sure how on earth we were going to manage to get everything accomplished. But just fitting in the few things we did yesterday? I already feel so much better and like life is going to continue on its merry way and everything will be wonderful.

It's amazing what getting a few things done can do for your stress level!

37 weeks, 2 days, 5 hours, 48 minutes

until Our Wedding

Putting Together My Puzzle

Those of you who follow me on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest or Instagram have likely noticed some changes on each of my social media accounts. My usernames have all been changed. My cover photo and profile pictures have been changed. And I've made an announcement on Facebook.

Musings of a Single Mama is no more.

WHY??

Mr. Boston and I became engaged on August 1st. I knew at that point that I was going to change my blog name. I hadn't put much thought into it, though. After all, the wedding was 10 months away. Why would I need to change my blog name now??

Well, technically I didn't need to change my blog name. But I decided last week that I really wanted to. I've spent the past several years defining myself as a single mom. It's been all of who I am and my identity was sort of overrun by being a single mother. I didn't know what else to think of myself as. I hadn't graduated college, I didn't have a boyfriend, I wasn't really proud of any of my accomplishments.

But then I met Mr. Boston. And life started getting a little bit easier. And then life began getting a lot easier. The big difference? I had help. I wasn't used to having help, and it took me a while to adjust (and I'm still not entirely adjusted) but it made a huge difference. I honestly hadn't understood just how much was going on in my life that I could ask for help with. But Mr. Boston stepped in and just started helping. Sometimes without asking. Talk about an eye-opener.

I've always been a proud person. I've always strived to be an independent person and hold my own. I've never liked asking for help. And I am still all of those things. Trust me, Mr. Boston knows that I am still all of those things. So he just does things for me. Like I said, I still haven't entirely gotten used to it.

What's amusing to me is that he's helping with the little things that have always seemed like the big things. Folding laundry, for example, is such a little thing but was always time consuming so it seemed like a big thing. Now I don't have to worry about it because he's willing to help me fold laundry or do it for me. He also does dishes, cleans out the cars, takes care of the dogs, etc. All those small things that just seemed like so much before.

Oh, and he helps KBug with her homework. This year homework hasn't been as much of a fight as it was last year. KBug hasn't been as stressed as she was last year (the bully is no longer at the school) and she's more willing to do her homework because she is often in a better mood. But it would still be thirty minutes each day that I would have to set aside to help her. I don't mind helping her or supervising her, but it's thirty minutes that I could also be using to grade papers or clean up my classroom. And now that Mr. Boston is around, I have that extra thirty minutes and it has been such a blessing to have just that little bit of extra time.

So since Mr. Boston and I began dating, I haven't really felt like a single mom. I haven't felt like I'm carrying the burden all on my own. I haven't felt like it's all up to me and like I always have to be the one to do everything. I have help. It may seem small to many of you, but it's big to me. It's really big.

And that's the main reason I decided to change the name of the blog. I've begun realizing that I am not just a single mom. And I'm realizing that I wasn't ever just a single mom. I am so much more than that, and I always have been. It's an amazing discovery. But since that discovery I have felt as though I've been lying when I write under the name of "Single Mama". So I decided it was time for a change.

I chose to call my blog "Putting Together My Puzzle". I am, slowly but surely, learning what all of the pieces of my puzzle are. I have so many things going on in my life right now and everything finally seems to be fitting into place. It's like each part of my life is, literally, a piece of my own personal puzzle. Therefore, I am "Putting Together My Puzzle" and I am doing it "One Piece at a Time". Over time you will see me talk about the different pieces of my puzzle and how they are starting to fit together. It may not look like much, and you may not always see how they fit together. Heck, maybe I won't even understand how it all works. But I'm going to write about it until I do understand.

CHANGES??

 

There will be some changes happening over the course of the next several weeks and posts.

 

The biggest change I plan to make is the use of names. It's always been evident that my name is Christine. I've never shied away from letting my name be known. It's never bothered me.

 

So why did it bother me to use the first names of my family members? Or of friends? Or of my fiancée? Well, I really don't know. So I'm going to introduce the key members to you now.

 

KBug is Kaley.

Mr. Boston is Pat.

Gramma. Well, she'll always be Gramma.

PJP is my brother Patric.

CKP is my sister Caitlin.

Mom and Poppa will remain Mom and Poppa.

 

Other than that, I will introduce other people as I go along and as needed. But that gives you the names of those I tend to talk about most.

 

For the moment, Kaley's father will remain the Ex Husband. It is possible that could change at some point, but I don't know if that's necessary. Honestly, there is such little interaction these days that it's hardly worth mentioning most of the time.

 

Other changes? Those will be mostly cosmetic. My header may change slightly, or my button, or the look and feel of my page. Obviously the name of my Facebook page will change. It's already in the works, but I have to wait for Facebook to allow the change to take place.

 

My email has also changed and can be accessed using the social media buttons in the sidebar. All the other social media buttons have also been changed to reflect the change in usernames.

 

At this point in time, I think that's all that I have for you. It's possible that other things will change as I create this new image for the blog and associated pages. But I will do my best to keep you all in the loop as the occur.

 

If you made it to the end of this post, all I can say is thank you. It's long and probably somewhat boring. But I felt it was important to tell you why I made the changes I have and what the changes are and will be. I like to keep you all in the know!