Chores: A Family Responsibility

Let's talk about chores.

I have never personally met anyone who actually enjoys doing chores. They aren't my favorite, they aren't my husband's favorite, and they definitely aren't my daughters favorite. If I had to guess, they probably aren't your favorite either.

Am I right? Or am I right?

However we may feel about chores, they are a part of life. If no one does the chores then we live in chaos. And I don't know about you, but I don't really want to live in a pig sty... Despite what my childhood bedroom may or may not have told you to the contrary...

Chores aren't fun. I hate doing the dishes. I hate sweeping the floors. I hate dusting the furniture. I hate cleaning the toilets. I hate giving the dogs baths and brushing their teeth. I don't really like chores. But they are a part of my every day life, regardless of how I feel about them.

My husband doesn't like chores. He doesn't like doing the dishes. He doesn't like doing the laundry. He doesn't like all of the things mentioned above. But, regardless of how he feels about them, they are a part of his life, too.

My daughter? She really doesn't like chores. She's nine years old and would rather be outside playing with her friends. Or playing with her Legos. Or watching Netflix. Or reading a book. Because who really wants to put their laundry away when they could be down the block on their bike?

Now I will be the first to say that my daughter doesn't have much to do in the way of chores. Of course she is responsible for clearing her dishes from the table after she's eaten, cleaning up her toys in her room and making sure the floor down her hallway is kept clear for people to walk. But I don't really consider those to be chores.

Kaley's "chores" are putting away her laundry, taking out the recycles and cleaning up the yard after the dogs. Those few things have been her chores for over three years now.

This past week, it was brought to my attention that maybe Kaley shouldn't be responsible for cleaning up after the dogs. People have said it shouldn't be her responsibility for reasons like they aren't her dogs, her step dad is home all day and it's just gross.

Sure, dog poop is pretty disgusting. No one wants to deal with it. But in our home they are her responsibility.

Yeah, her step dad is home all day. But he's also had nine spine surgeries and when they implanted the spinal cord stimulator in the summer of 2014 he was told that bending over could pull the wires out of the device and render it useless.

No, none of the dogs are really "labeled" as being "Kaley's dog". Why is this? Because we have asked her to show that she is responsible enough to take care of a dog. And she hasn't quite done that yet.

So, while we wait, two of the dogs remain "mine" and the other is a service dog for my husband.

But are we really in the wrong for expecting her to clean up the yard after the dogs?

And, let's be real- we live in South Carolina where it rains more days than it doesn't. So how often is she really out in the backyard cleaning up dog poop? Maybe once every three weeks when we've finally had four or five days without rain.

Maybe our understanding of things that should be a kids responsibility are out of line... Maybe we shouldn't expect our kids to do the same kinds of things we were expected to do as kids... Maybe kids are meant to live a life free of responsibility...

But not my kid. My child is expected to be a functional member of this family, with specific responsibilities to help our family be the best we can be. And if we all share the household responsibilities, even the ones we don't enjoy, then we will have more time to spend with one another and doing the things we love.

Because no one person should be responsible for everything if the home is meant to be happy.