Time is Passing By

So we're two-thirds of the way through the month of March in the year 2013. And I'm sitting here thinking

"Wasn't it just 2011, like, yesterday?"

 

Seriously, I'm having a ridiculously hard time with how quickly time is passing. It feels like just yesterday I was working as a nanny and beginning my first blog and really just getting started with finishing my degree. And then, in the blink of an eye, I'm a Middle School teacher and in the last six months before I have my degree.

 

Talk about scary!

 

And, what's really starting to get to me is my daughter is going to be 7. In 5 weeks and 3 days.

 

Seven.

 

I know that KBug has to grow up. It's a part of life. And I completely understand that.

 

But does my baby really have to be seven already?

 

It seems like just yesterday I was holding her in my arms for the first time and I was learning how to be a mom to a newborn. I was cuddling my KBug and I was feeding her and bathing her and doing everything I could to give her everything she needed.

 

I remember everything about her toddler years. I remember playing dress up with her, coloring with her, running through the sprinklers with her. I remember reading to her continuously and watching "Monkey George" (Curious George) with her every morning. I remember playing with her doll house and listening to her invent these elaborate, imaginative stories for her dolls. I remember picking up imaginary telephones and carrying on lengthy conversations about whatever she wanted to talk about.

 

 

And now she's a big girl. KBug still needs me; every child still needs their Mom. But she doesn't need me as much as she did just a few years ago. Or even as much as she needed me just last year.

 

Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love watching KBug grow up and become an amazing young girl. But sometimes it's hard to know that she'll never be really little again and that she will continue to need me less and less as time goes on.

 

She's not-quite seven and already fiercely independent. KBug loves to do things on her own just to prove that she can. Even if it's something she really doesn't have to do, she wants to. Because she believes she can do anything. And I am so proud that she believes that.

 

I am so proud that telling her over and over again that she can do anything and be anything has actually made a difference. I love knowing that my words have encouraged her and empowered her as much as I had hoped. Because that makes all the difference in the world in a child's life.

 

That support, that knowledge that someone else believes in you can push you through struggle after struggle, challenge after challenge, until you feel like you can do the impossible.

 

And KBug is getting to that point. She believes in herself and her abilities so much. And it amazes me every single day.

 

I also love how helpful she loves to be most of the time.

 

Of course KBug has her days, like any young child, where she is all about KBug and doesn't want to be bothered to do anything for anyone else. But even on those days, she's pretty easily convinced that it would be a good idea.

 

For example, today at the school or 2nd and 3rd grade classes went on a field trip. Except that one of the students had forgotten their booster seat. So GMa had taken KBug's booster out of her car for them to borrow. Well, at the end of the day when it was time to leave, KBug was bound and determined to carry that booster back out to the car.

 

However, the booster is one of those with a back. And with KBug being so little, the booster is practically as tall as her when she's standing. So I didn't think it would be safe for her to carry it all the way out to the car. But I swear it was like moving a mountain to get her to understand why I didn't want her to carry it to the car because she was absolutely certain that she could do it and be just fine. And I love to see that level of confidence in her!

 

But, again, as much as I love all of these pieces of her as she gets older, I do miss having my baby. I miss having her crawl into my bed and not taking up 3/4 of it. I miss the days when she had to come to me for things, like food and water, instead of being able to find and obtain them for herself. I miss holding my KBug in my lap as often as possible and having her fit just perfectly.

 

But KBug is growing up. And KBug is becoming an absolutely amazing young girl. And I am so proud of her and I am so thankful to have such a blessing in my life.

 

And, in the end....

 

 

KBug will always have a place in my heart. That is one place she will never outgrow, no matter how old or how big she gets.